9|1|19- Talkin’ Body

Real talk for just a few minutes. If as a woman, you are confident all the time, you are either lying, or you’re some sort of alien from God knows where. I am the first person to say that feeling confident or the lack thereof is subjective. And I say that mostly because people are very quick to say, “your worst is better than my best” or “you’re so thin you shouldn’t ever feel like you aren’t happy with yourself”. Well eff off and eff off. I have more days than I would like to admit that I hate the way I look.

So to get into it, here’s how I sometimes feel and what I have gathered from those feelings. Feel FREE to let me know if you relate. I go through periods of time where I HATE the way my clothes fit. I change 4 or 5 times before I leave the house, and then I do my hair or change something else about my appearance to make it all better (or at least try to make it all better). And then there are times that I feel super confident. I put on the first thing I see and I am rocking it. I sometimes correlate these times with my time of the month and I sometimes relate it to hmm I don’t know, insanity? It is so hard to explain, but the more I have been open about it, the more I have found people relate to it.

I, for a long time, never worried about my weight or working out. I was super active and between dancing, and competitive gymnastics fitness was pretty much taken care of. I ate what I wanted, and never gained an ounce. Moving into my adult life, things didn’t come that easy. I gained tons of weight in college and literally hated who I saw in the mirror. I made huge life changes, and realized that being healthy was about to take a lot more effort. People often assume that I am fit by design, which would in fact, be wrong. Not only do I have to workout daily, but my diet plays a huge role in my health and physical heath. Without one or the other, my life falls to literal shit. Not only do I hate the way I look, but I also hate the way I feel.

Nonsense. Why is it so hard as an adult to stay fucking healthy? Jesus.

I have my moments, where I am happy as a clam, and I have my moments where I am a fat rat eating cheese. Luckily, I have the worlds best support system- to support me when I obsess over working out and eating healthy, and remind me that my ass still looks great. (hehe, love you dude).

This week, (today), I started the Pure Barre 30 in 60 challenge. Which, as it reads, is 30 classes in 60 days. This sort of shit motivates me. I am already 1 for 1. I will fall behind I’m sure, but I will keep you all updated.

Anyways, point being, you’re fine. No matter where you are in your life, you’re fine.

Perfect. Just. The. Way. You. Are.


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